How does all this end up happening?
How am I supposed to impress upon people that what they do isn't right?
I know that makes me sound arrogant, that I think I know better enough that I feel I must teach a lesson, but it's mainly concern. I see this stupid, self-destructive behaviour and I can't contain my commentary. It's idiotic. They shouldn't be doing it. I can't cover for them forever. I feel like the best I can do is tell them they're making bad decisions, but that's not enough. First of all, they (well, at least one of them) won't listen. Second of all, I feel like a poseur acting like I know so much better even though I know I'm right. Most of the time I don't say anything; I worry that if I express any form of disapproval they won't trust me. Which is more important: trust or truth? A tiny part of me wants to just reveal everything. I can see it: every truth, every secret spilled, just laying there poised to spawn the frightening wrath they have the potential to incite. I just can't do that though. As I said, I can only try to show them that they are making stupid choices. I don't know if I can do it.
Then there's the fact that I just want to be in control of my own life. I get sucked into all this idiotic drama because I'm just trying to make the right decisions for myself. I really depend on people for very little, but this one thing that she's in control of she can't seem to handle. It's the only thing I really, truly ask. I'm told not to worry, it's not my problem, but it is. It is ultimately solely my problem; it is my future; it is my life.
I try so hard to make the right decisions. I try to be a good person. I try to do the right thing and make everyone happy but it never seems to be enough.
I don't know what I should do. I mean that in so many ways it's ridiculous.